So I got to thinking about how I haven't checked this in two years. Almost two years to the day, crazy I know. I don't really know why I stopped updating this, but I assume it was my busy schedule and the huge transformation everyone made to Facebook and Myspace. I have to say I don't vent on those, it's not as private and I don't trust putting my thoughts out there like that. I have a load on my mind at the moment and I thought I should update my once loyal readers...

Well hello, it's been a while. How are all of you? I'm doing pretty well. I've been recently battling an interesting sickness, which I am pretty sure is ulcers. All the other testing has come back fine, so this weekend I'll know if I'm crazy or not I guess.

Moving on, school is ok, except for the month I missed being sick. It's stressing me out because I really want to graduate next year and start my own life away from the annoyances of exams. San Jose has grown on me, but I still miss the East coast and my friends back in Texas. I just have to get through this last month and hopefully everything will work out.

My love life, or lack their of, is the same as it was two years ago. I'm going to be 23 in September and I still haven't had a real relationship. That's probably the most stressful thing of all. I feel like the older I get the less time I actually have to experience something like that before...well before marriage becomes next on my list of worries. I know times are different now, but I always thought it would happen right after college. I guess there are things I want to do with my life, travel, try and make it on my own in a strange city, and find more of myself. I guess maybe that's why I haven't had a relationship. It's hard to say that though. I mean most of my friends found themselves in the process of going through relationships and breakups. I wonder if I will have that type of life changing experience. I mean sure I've dated a few guys, and ended it before it really began because I wasn't happy or attracted to those guys as much as I should have been. It wasn't fair to pretend. I mean they say you know when you meet them, and honestly I knew it wasn't right when I met them. I thought it was just me being picky or thinking it was normal to question how I actually felt about them at the time. If I'm not 100% attracted to someone, it's not going to work. That's means physically, intellectually, emotionally and well religiously. I have a comfort level and I need that met. I also know I have high expectations. If I told you...well most of you know, but if I told you what kind of man I wanted to marry you would think I'm crazy! I really only have one main requirement and it has to do with him playing a certain sport...yeah he needs to be a hockey player, not necessarily a pro because the other things, the details, will fall into place. I can't help it. I need someone to be as passionate or more passionate about a sport I've loved my whole life. I want that. Plain and simple, no if's and's or but's about it. It has to happen. Ok, you can call me crazy now.

So when will my life fall into place? When will I be completely satisfied with who I am and what I'm doing? When will that man enter my life? When? Who knows...but it's like they say, whoever they are, timing is everything.

So I said I'd update about my week with laura and everything. It was a blast and really surreal having her here. We went to the zoo and the aquairum, shopping and stuff and just talked and stuff it was great. If any of you come visit we are so going to the zoo it's extremely awesome. I've missed having a girlfriend to rant and catch up with. Although my schedule didn't allow me to see her that much, it was fun. I was getting used to spending weekends and stuff on my own, so having her here to hang out with and be stupid with was just what I needed, but I wish I could have that all the time! Just like my parents and brother always say it will take time to get there with people. I kind of have a feeling I won't have those kind of friends until I transfer to SJSU. I've already contacted this club that I'm really excited about and talked with the co-creater and another member. It's called Spartan Squad, it's a school spirit club. Those of you who know me, know I'm all over that considering I was the only one at UB who knew the fight song and I got really into any game I went too. So, I'm completely excited about this, eventually I guess I'll have the opportunity to become a squad lead (they get to lead the chants and stuff at the games/events, and set up other things to get school spirit around the campus). They get these really cool blue and gold striped ties to distinguish them from other members of the club (because anyone can be a member by just signing up for the club), it's a lot like the Mighty Maniacs at UB but a little more involved and they don't run out of shirts! I'm still mad that I never got one, haha! Anyway, I am getting really excited about going back to a real college life, cause Vista doesn't have one. So I'm still waiting for my spring break it's in april the 10-16, my Dad and bro have theirs this week so the baseball team is actually going down to Texas tomorrow (Lubbuck) to play some games there and Nevada also. I wish I could go, I know people at Tech and I'm sure those of you that are close would come see me...lol. Oh well I'm planning on coming down sometime this summer hopefully. Well, I've been rambling so I'll wrap it up...I'll write again soo, hope everyone has a great weekend and week!